Talk to your kids about bullying
Parents please read this article to your kids and then go to www.stopbullying.gov/kids/what-you-can-do/ and watch videos of kids talking about bullying and animated videos. Discuss bullying prevention and intervention with your children often. Invite your kids to read about bullying at www.pbskids.org/itsmylife/friends/bullies/.
“Bullying is unwanted, aggressive behavior among school aged children that involves a real or perceived power imbalance. The behavior is repeated or has the potential to be repeated, overtime,” according to StopBullying.gov.
Olweus and Limber (2010) conducted study on bulling with more than 520,000 students in grades 3 through 12. They found that as children age they are less likely to tell a teacher, other school personnel, a parent, a sibling or friend. In third grade, 36% told teacher, 50% told parent, 49% told sibling/friend, and 18% told no one. In grade 12, 23% told teacher, 23% told parent, 36% told sibling or friend, and 47% told no one.
Why are some youth silent about being bullied? Peers who tell may fear being called a snitch. Young children may believe teachers or others will call them tattlers. Boys may fear appearing weak. Bullies may threaten retaliation. When kids report bullying to adults and it continues, they believe the bullying will not stop.
In this same study, younger children felt sorry for peers who were bullied; however middle and high school students expressed less sympathy for bullied peers. Fewer than half of elementary students said they would try to help bullied peers. Parents can encourage children to safely stand up for bullied peers, befriend shy students, and sit with bullied peers on the bus.
Lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgendered (LGBT) youth, children with disabilities and socially isolated adolescents may be at an increased risk of being bullied. Children with special health care needs or chronic diseases (diabetes, muscular dystrophy, spina bifida, atopic eczema) are more frequently bullied. Overweight and obese youth may be more likely to be bullied. Children and adolescents with learning disabilities are at a greater risk of being teased and physically bullied, compared with other children. Adults can help children accept themselves and others regardless of body shape, size, weight, height or appearance.
Bullying often occurs out of sight from adults; bathrooms, hallways, bus, or playground. Teach children the anti-bully buddy system. Students can pair up with friends in these “hotspot” places.
Parents can talk to bus drivers and suggest assigned seats. Find information on training for school bus drivers regarding bullying intervention and prevention at the School Bus Safety website. Visit www.nasdpts.org/Operations/Drivers.html.
Parents can ask older siblings to check in with bullied younger siblings during school hours if possible. Sisters and brother can be allies at school and at home.
Parents need to regularly discuss cyberbulling with their children. Talk about Facebook, Twitter, text messaging, and emailing. Create ground rules for computers and cell phone usage.
Sesame Street Workshop is a website that provides a video of Big Bird addressing the topic of bullying. It provides helpful materials for conversations with younger children about bullying and appropriate behavior in school and social settings. Visit www.sesamestreet.org.
The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) developed KnowBullying, a free smart phone app. It provides parents, caretakers, educators, and others with information and communication support to help prevent bullying and build resilience in children. Their research shows that 15 minutes a day of focused conversation with a child about issues related to bullying can help build self-esteem and prevent bullying. Visit: www.store.samhsa.gov/apps/bullying.
Conversations about bullying prevention and intervention begin at home. Parents have a vital role in teaching safety and social skills to children; empathy and sympathy qualities; and how to safely stand up for self and for peers.
Dr. Missy, Ph.D., is a feelings helper, child therapist, play therapist, and child trauma therapist. She provides therapeutic services at Affirmations, Columbus, Ohio.
One Response
Most Excellent article !
Thanks !