Tip—Make abuse prevention teaching automatic, low-key, and matter-of-fact safety information
Most of us parents get the shivers when we think of abduction and the sexual abuse of children. Because these topics are so frightening, many of us neglect to give our children ordinary, common-sense instruction on how to protect themselves. Some parents worry that providing any information on preventing sexual abuse will give rise to premature questions about sexuality. Other parents worry that they will frighten their children by discussing these topics. Still others procrastinate and simply hope for the best.
The reality is that uninformed children are vulnerable. It is our responsibility as parents to teach basic safety rules—and abuse prevention is easily incorporated into these. Interestingly enough, children are usually very interested in learning how to protect themselves—they feel more empowered than frightened.
Tools—Parenting Press has several very helpful books to assist parents in this task. The tools below are drawn from these books.
- Make abuse prevention a part of your general teaching. For example, when you teach a child to watch out for cars when crossing the street, teach him also what to do if a driver stops and calls to him or beckons him to come close to talk. When you teach your child about privacy and modesty (for example, closing the door when using the bathroom) take the opportunity also to reinforce, “There are private parts of your body that no one else is allowed to touch. And you are not allowed to touch these parts of another person’s body.”
- Teach your children how to tell the difference between comfortable (loving) touch and uncomfortable touch. A child who knows the difference is less likely to mistake abusive touching for affection. It’s MY Body and Loving Touches are specifically designed to help parents teach this concept to children as young as three.
- Play “What would you do if . . .?” Use all sorts of safety-related situations. For example, “What would you do if you were at the grocery store and you couldn’t find me?” “What would you do if your cousin asked you to play naked?” “What would you do if you found your brother playing with matches?” “What would you do if a man approached you at the park and asked you to help him find his lost puppy?”
You’ll find more practical tips you can use right now in Parenting Press’s personal safety books.
